Am I..am I tripolar?!?

Hello all!

I hope you’re all doing well in your bipolar and/or sobriety journeys.

Just a quick check-in for today. I’ve been off the grid for a while after having a crazy few months but I’m happy to report I’m still hanging in there…and so proud to be able to say I am now 112 days sober! I never thought I’d be able to say I’ve been sober for FOUR WHOLE MONTHS! For me, that’s a great achievement in itself considering I could rarely go one week without getting shit-faced and passing out on the couch, but I’m actually amazed at how strong my will has become given the goings-on of the last few months.

About 6-8wks into my ‘sober journey’, I had the most chaotic week of my life.  Here’s how it went;

Monday: Car repossessed because I’d missed so many payments funding my recent manic episodes

Tuesday: Had to move house.  Yes, with no car.

Wednesday: Interview for a new job. Still moving. Still no car.

Thursday: Macbook packed in, later costing me about as much as a small country to fix. Still with the moving….

Friday: Got the job (yassss!!)

Saturday: Desperately seeking a cheap car for me to buy to get to my new job

Sunday: Suitably cheap car found and purchased in order to get me to my new place of work.

Monday: First day of new job, and commenced of my new life by the beach 🙂

That whole week has taught me so much. I didn’t crumble into a self-pitying heap, complaining that it’s so unfair I have to deal with everything completely alone (poor me). And I didn’t choose to drown in the familiar and perverse comfort of depression and booze. I’m truly amazed at myself that I stayed strong: I’m genuinely perplexed that that person was in me all along. For those of you who remember the show ‘Stars in their Eyes’, I feel like a contestant who says ‘Tonight, Matthew, I’m going to be….a different person!’ before disappearing behind the curtain only to be unveiled as someone else.

It’s bringing this whole Bipolar business to a whole new level!

I’ve so much to share but not enough time so I’ll have to leave it at that, but here’s a heads up to those on Lithium…I will soon be back to ask for your opinions!

Until then, take care of yourselves lovelies and stay well 🙂

xx

 

 

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